No Man is an Island
You have heard it from your pastor. Speakers like Robert Lewis and even Tony Robbins talk about building a support team or being in a small group. I will say it again.. though with many, many more words, because I like (the sound of my own voice) to prattle on..
We all go through times of crisis. Crisis of identity, faith, purpose, or usefulness. We experience it in times of difficulty with finances, relationships, work, injury, or even depression. More than the tests and trials of life, we experience moments of doubt, so severe, that we forget whom (who?) we are and for what we were designed. We know we aren’t strong enough, but our Lord seems so far away.
This article is not about who we are in Christ, or How our heavenly father looks at us, though I will reserve the right to talk about that some other time. It is not about how the adversary uses doubt and discouragement, (I may touch on that later too). It is about being a member of the whole. Being in the body of Christ and in the FAMILY of our God’s children.
In my life…
My life at home is amazing. God has blessed my family with an abundance of love, patience, joy, kindness, understanding, joy, a desire to work and play together and … well… joy. ( did I mention -= joy =- ^_^ ? )I am blessed by an amazing wife, who is my perfect match, a brilliant son, who likes to build volcanoes on the kitchen table and his Auntie, who lives next door.
My life in ministry is simply awesome. I am using my gifts and talents to build web sites like BibleCounts, this BIC: Just Ask… web site and the new Redeemed N Delivered site that is currently underway. I get to work with Men’s Ministries and the Men’s Fraternity Series at Emanuel Faith Community Church. And I am studying the word of God in-depth. I get to use many tools like OliveTree Bible Reader and Bible Explorer, as well as books and devotionals like “The Treasury of David” and “God Guy“. I am on a path to full-time ministry if it is the will of our Lord. I am blessed with a passion and talent for these things, and I hope to do them full-time.
Even with these blessings, I went through a bit of that ugly nature recently, and as I occasionally do. Looking at my work situation, I am drastically under-employed. I need to get an influx of clients and business and I am not motivated because I DON’T KNOW HOW to do it very well for myself. This of course means I am not bringing much financial support home. I am very busy, but it is not all “profitable work”… (I need to drink my own cool-aid on this one. I know how to use technology to help my clients but for some reason it doesn’t work so well for me. Maybe I am too close to the process.)
Even with these blessings… I beat myself up
So I beat myself up: I am not a good provider for my family and my business partner(s). How do I cover all these expenses and bills? Do I not have faith in the Lord’s provision? I do not know what my next step in faith should be. I can’t afford to visit family for the Christmas holiday. How can I afford to fix my car? All the guys in my group are working again, how come I can’t find more work? … and so much more…
I quickly get sucked into the quick sand of misery and start looking for the next distraction: Is that bottle of whatever gonna make me forget? Could that adult internet site give me the distraction from life that I crave? Maybe another video game would give me a sense of accomplishment. Should I call that guy for a hit of this or that? All of these things cross our minds guys. Don’t hide from it! Admit it, recognize it, address it! It is part of the battle. ( I personally have a sexual addiction. I have long since put filters on ALL my internet connections, but I AM a technical person and COULD circumvent them. The good news is 1. it’s NOT EASY to do and 2. it takes work thus giving the spirit more time to convict me and distract me).
That calm, quiet voice called out. ” Have you called anyone?”
My small voice has two tones. One sounds like Mufasa, Simba’s Dad from The Lion King. (Like Darth Vader but more loving, so I say Simba’s Dad.) Usually, that is Abba, the Father, calling me gently to His will and sovereign purpose. The other tone is my wife’s sweet voice. The one she uses when she KNOW’s she is right, but Loves me so much she won’t just come out and say what a guy would say: “Do it this way stupid.” That voice is the voice of the Spirit for me, convicting me in Love and calm, asking me the question that needs to be asked. That was the voice I heard that day. That calm, quiet voice of reason called out. ” Have you called anyone?”
I felt the need to reach out. I thought of the guys from my accountability group. Then I realized: “I can’t call any one of them. All those guys are working again and have ‘real jobs’.” (They work for other companies, not contracting, or self-employed). More limitations came from that ugly voice, as it tried to bury me in despair over and again. That Strong, deep Voice of Truth (not Mufasa) told me to reach out and whom I could call.
I did call, and though I felt ashamed and foolish in that initial moment, when I met with him and spoke to another BIC, I was uplifted. I was able to share my thoughts and feelings and be assured of my value, God’s plan, and the Lord’s place for me. Through conversation and the sharing of scripture, the Spirit was able to encouraged me and filter out the voice of the accuser. Brothers, we are NOT meant to be alone in this fight. We are called to fellowship for so many reasons… (BIC came from an inside joke after watching the movie Fire Proof. Brothers-In-Christ became BIC, like the lighter. So my mission label became “BIC: On-Fire for God’s call™”, and the fire themed jokes just carried on…)
- Hebrews 10:24-25 – Tells us to draw near and encourage one another
- Philippians 2:1-4 – Tells us to become involved in each other’s lives
- Acts 2:42 – Tells us that the disciples spent the majority of their time in fellowship, teaching and prayer
- 2 Corinthians 6:14 – Reminds us not to look for this kind of sharing with the non-believers, because they are not held to the same standards we are.
- 1 John 1:1-7 – Tells us that Fellowship with and through Christ is the primary goal of Evangelism.
So I thank God for my Brothers In Christ. I thank the Lord for His plan and purpose. He designed fellowship to fill this gap, to bolster us when we felt apart from God. He designed it to show us the strength of our Lord when we are weakest. So reach out and connect with a small group, a Bible study, or a couple of other faithful men. It was our Lord’s plan and command.
No man is an island entire of itself; every man
is a piece of the continent, a part of the main;
if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe
is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as
well as a manor of thy friends or of thine
own were; any man’s death diminishes me,
because I am involved in mankind.
And therefore never send to know for whom
the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.– John Donne, a Christian Philosopher/Thinker/Writer/Poet 1572-1631
May Jesus have His way with your day
He is Founder and consultant for Tek Management,
Founder of the Men’s Leadership site: CalebStrong.org,
Co-Founder of the online Bible study app: BibleCounts
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